A pair of shoes

Joy....Humility....Blessed.....Loved... those are just a few things I feel right now. All I do know is that I am sitting in my room with a pair of brand new and expensive church shoes that were not bought with my hands, but with those of a man who struggles with the weight of poverty. I´ll begin with the story of a boy I met in February named Alex. 

This little boy was like none other that I had encountered in Villa Hermosa. It is hard to find glimpses of Jesus when you are surrounded by children who live such awful lives, but when I met this child, it was like a light had been given to me while walking down this long and dark tunnel. His eyes were so big and his smile made everything seem so much better. You literally could not think of anything negative while watching this young man. His hugs were addictive and I would repeat all those moments he fell asleep in my arms if I could. When I saw him.. I saw a true disciple. Although young... his heart was growing rapidly. 

So here I am.... July 27th. heading to his house to ride to church with him and his family. His father, the pastor of the church, had invited me to start attending regularly. Now let me remind you, this family has the same struggles the other people do living here. Some days they eat, others they don´t. Some days Alex has clean clothes, other times he has to wear the same shirt, pants, and underwear several days in a row. The parents have little to nothing, yet run a church built by a mission team and tend to their six children. 

As I stepped into the home, I was greeted with hugs from all but 1..... Alex. About 6 seconds later, he came limping in with a bright red face and red spots all over him. He was sick with the virus, Chikungunya, which is spread by mosquitoes and leaves terrible joint problems along with a high fever and hot bumps. Looking into his bloodshot, teary eyes, I knew it was bad. But this very sick boy looked down to see that my feet were filthy from walking. In fear of tracking in dirt to the church service, I asked if I could clean them at the house. Immediately, Alex led me outside and brought out a bucket containing water and his clothes he was waiting to wash. I told him I could do it myself, but before I could finish he took my sandals off and put them in the bucket with his clothes, making the water and his clothes dirty. Scrubbing them clean, he handed them back and then started on my feet. This very sick child.... this child who wanted clean clothes and to simply lie down.. put the feet of a healthy man who had more than enough clean clothes in his only few pairs of clothing and sacrificed his own needs for my want... And the story doesn´t end there.

The father of Alex walked in and said that He would like to buy me some shoes for church. I told him I could buy some with my money, but He refused over and over again. So I was escorted to their car, which was falling apart, and used the little gas they had to take me to the store. While there, He used what I believe was the majority of his money to purchase shoes that I wouldn´t have a problem with buying back at home. They were beautiful and comfortable....and well bought by a man who gave up fathers day because he knew they didn't have any money to celebrate it. Bought by a man who couldn´t give his children any birthday parties because of the lack of payment he receives at his job. Bought by a man who looked at a missionary, knowing he had more than enough money, and went ahead and served him anyways. 

Everyone who goes on mission trips has this intentionality to give to those who are poor, but for the first time in my entire life... I had the needy give back to me. And I saw Jesus... this powerful... merciful...humbling Jesus. And the blessings still did not stop....

Today is Father´s Day in the Dominican republic and at church, the congregation honored all those who had held a father figure position one way or another. They called up each man at a time thanking him for doing what must fathers here run away from. Then out of nowhere my name was read aloud on the microphone. The words that followed brought me to tears. ¨this is given to a man who has become like a father to dozens and dozens of children who need one in Villa Hermosa¨.

I am nothing but a vessel... a simple follower who does what his Father tells him... but when I heard those words.... I felt as if God was standing right there speaking them into my heart. And I am relieved. Your hardest critic is yourself, and man have I been criticizing myself. My entire time here has been moments of wondering if anything I am doing is actually making a dent... and nights like tonight make it clear to me that God wants me to keep pressing in with this village. I hope he is doing the same with you and where you are at. I am going to leave you with a challenge. 

If a family of 8 who have little to nothing can live out a life of missions and servant hood.... there is no doubt that you can to. Get up and serve my brothers and sisters. The needy are calling your name. I love you all... Goodnight. 

Alex after crying in my arms due to having to wear the same clothes for days, reading in scripture about how God providing for His children 

Missions: in the form of a 10 year old.

My eyes burn. They burn when I see a hungry child pressed against the glass at the restaurant I am at starving to just have a taste of what's on my plate. They burn when I see the aftermath of what an abusive father can do to the back of his four year old child with a belt. They burn when I stand outside of a pool hall at night only to find a congregation of children sitting and watching as their mothers prostitute themselves half naked in front of strange men that look nothing like their fathers. And They burn most when a child clenches your hand, begging for you to be his father and you aren't the least surprised because the scars across his arms and face show reason why he asked in the first place.

That is what experiencing a third world country can do to you. You are scarred with things you can never unsee. They are forever stamped into your brain. but... there are also moments that remind you why you bought your plane tickets in the first place. Moments like what happened today.

They followed me. 6 of them. Some trailing at a distant and the others at my side with my arm over their shoulders. the walk to the store wasn't far but enough to cause the attention of an elderly woman under a tree. At first her words were too soft to understand, but after being dragged towards her by the children, I realized what she wanted. food. Just some rice and chicken. She hadn't eaten at all yet lived seconds away from the store. And there she sat asking kindly but embarrassingly for some food to eat. At first I was hesitant because giving food to her meant an immediate crowed of other civilians asking for the same thing. And my money couldn't cover all of them. So I kindly saluted her and walked away. But as I got closer to the store the bible verse Matthew 25:35 came to mind. "For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in."....

I could easily enter the store, purchase the food, and hand it to the woman, but I felt God tell me to go about things differently. I prayed for a moment and then looked down at what filled the empty spaces between my fingers. With wide eyes and crooked teethe there stood the children. But.... they were no longer children to me. There they stood with scraped knees and runny noses.. Missionaries. I placed the different foods in each of their hands then asked simply if they would like to be a missionary. With a large grin they nodded proudly then ran as fast as they could towards the elderly woman. As I walked out of the store, a look of astonishment swept across my face. And I became more amazed when just 10 minutes later I saw one of my kids, Eddy, buy candy with his own money only to pass it out to all the other boys playing with me and Blake.

Just when you think our effort has run out. Just when you believe that there is nothing else that can be done in the community of Villa Hermosa, cracks of hope begin to submerge. A neighborhood once full with fighting and drugs and hatred, was now showing little bits and pieces unity and hope and love and.....well.... Jesus. I left Villa Hermosa today witnessing the presence of Jesus. He is beginning to bring on a revolution and I am blessed enough to get a front row seat to witness it all.

The sun began to set as our footprints left the town followed by fifteen other sets. It was time to go home, but still they followed. I pulled one in close, and the words he began to whisper into my ear stopped my heart. "I'm a missionary!", he said smiling. It wasn't necessarily the words that brought joy, but rather it was the fact that they left the mouth of a child covered in scars from abuse and a past that you wouldn't dare ask about. "I'm a missionary......" hm...

Thank you for the prayers and the donations. It is being put to good use here! From a bicycle to loads of food for families, you guys are doing just as much of missions here as I am. Keep up the good work!! with love,
                              Landon

His still small voice

¨I want to go home¨.......

For the first two weeks leading up to this one, that is all I could seem to think each day. From seeing the lives of the kids I have been witnessing to fall apart to being overwhelmed by mission team after mission team, the phrase I thought would never came to mind, could not leave my head. As Each day passed, the mosquitoes seemed as if they had multiplied, the temperature had risen, and the showers got colder. I love this country and while in the states, this place was all I could talk about... But for the past few weeks, I just have wanted to be with my family. I have desired a nice, comfortable bed with good air conditioning, warm showers where I have time to think, and even a nice glass of sweet tea. All the other times I have been here, things have gone as planned and it was happiness. I knew the day would come where God would reveal things to me in this culture that would break my heart, but I never knew that it would be thrown at me within the first week of my arrival. 

I´ve been weak, I´ve been tired, and I hadn't seemed to find a  place to rest from all of this. 

But I knew God was there. 

I could not see him.

I could not feel Him.

But I was waiting patiently for His still small voice to arrive.

And it did. 

It had been a day to unwind at Hope mission. The South Carolina team was wrapping up their VBS and medical clinic, and things were going smoothly. As I entered the gates of the vacation bible school, a small 5 year old boy caught my eye. He sat in the hot sun with a large burn streaked across his face. Where it came from, I do not know, but it was infected and he was rubbing dirt in it. I looked for his mother, but she had dropped him off and went home. So, I picked him up and held him. Within ten minutes, he was sound asleep. And for a short moment, everything went silent. I could not hear the children playing. I could not hear the teachers teaching. All that was brought to my ears was the little sounds this child made. And in this moment of beauty and silence, I could feel and see and hear Jesus. When I felt his heartbeat against my chest, I could feel Jesus. When I saw his eyes flutter and when he moved in his sleep, I could see Jesus. And carried by the sound of his calm breaths was the sound of Jesus playing in my ears. 

For two weeks, he seemed absent. For two weeks my prayers seemed unanswered and I felt at loss. But now, while holding this child, this angel of the Lord, He was everywhere.... In the trees that swayed when that brief breeze halted the continuous heat from the sun..... in the hearts of the sick as they stepped out of line to let the ones more ill in. Everywhere... Jesus was everywhere. 

It can take the simplicity of things not going the way you wanted them to, to completely cause a downfall in your heart and your spiritual walk, but something as small as a child falling asleep in your arms can cause the truth of why you´re at the place that you are at to consume you once again. I have struggled and I have been broken, but after holding one of God´s children... I am reminded of my reasoning behind this trip. So bring on the heat.. bring on the drought... bring on the bugs that bite and the bone chilling water. Let it cause me to be physically ill if it comes down to it.... But I will not let the thoughts of the world overwhelm my willing spirit and strength in Jesus. I am a soldier of God, and a soldier of God does not give up because things get hard.... 

Romans 8:18

For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us.

Noel sound asleep

They just opened it and started reading :)

Enjoying the free toys from the South Carolina team

My Nineveh

When it comes to missions, I have no expectations. I told myself that before I came, and after this week, I will forever live by that. When you enter a village, you never know what´s going to occur, especially if you´ve been away from that village for months. One moment, you are praising Jesus as a little boy you have been pouring out prayer on for years accepts Jesus, and the next moment you are sitting down with the Principal of his school as she tells you he is no longer welcome due to drinking on campus. And then you start crying out to God because that little boy is only seven years old. 

It´s hard to explain my emotions right now. To sum all of them up, I guess I could say that it feels as if the moment I stepped off the plane and entered the Dominican Republic, I was welcomed with closed doors and a broken heart. I had this vision in my mind of what my summer would look like. I had no expectations as in lesson plans and what I was going to do minute by minute, but I at least thought that I would have beautiful moments with my kids and endless laughs. I thought that my mornings would be welcomed by smiles and ended by hugs and warmth from the hearts of the children, but it seemed as if everything had become the exact opposite. 

Instead of playful games, I had to pull a 12 year old child named Manuel away from another kid right before Manuel hit him with an axe. Instead of having meaningful talks with a child, I had to take a  razor he had brought to school away from him. I wanted my week to involve playing tag and loving on my boys, but instead I walked away with bite marks and bruises from breaking up fight after fight after fight after fight.....I came home last night with a broken spirit and I was just so confused as to why everything is so different... Why are things getting worse? Why do the parents of my kids not care? Why and how did everything get so bad in just three months.... 

I have taken a step back and realized that I have three months. Three months to do some damage control. Three months to make things right in Villa Hermosa. Three months to unite the boys and girls living around the area I work in. It seems almost impossible but then I remember the story of Nineveh. God had sent Jonah to Nineveh, the most dangerous area around, to convince the citizens to change their ways.They fought, they killed, they sinned endlessly. But God chose Jonah to go to Nineveh. Jonah was distraught and did not understand and even ran from God, but God brought him back. He wanted to make it clear to Jonah the importance of what He needed to do. So Jonah went. He declared God´s orders amongst the people, and said that if they did not turn from their wicked ways, God would destroy Nineveh. Within three days, all had surrendered to God. All had given up and given in to God. 

Villa Hermosa, Dominican Republic is my Nineveh. It is one of the most dangerous cities and these people are running from God, but He does not want me to give up on them like everyone else has. And most importantly, He wants me to make it known amongst them that He hasn´t given up on them either. It seems impossible and at times I just want to run away to a safer city where fights are few and the children are nicer, but God has made it clear to me what I must do. If that means that I have to get punched in the face 100 more times by kids, then so be it, but I´m not giving up on God, because God never once gave up on me. 

Dirty hands

   The roads just kept going. There were no turns, no houses, no people for miles and miles. Our view consisted of dirt roads and rows of sugar cane aligned alongside the left and right of us. Every now and then our eyes would come upon a carcus of a dog, but without anything to marvel at, we were left alone with our thoughts. as the silence reminisced throughout the van, my mind began to wonder what we were about to experience. 
   Hours away from the city of La Romana lied villages covered head to toe in poverty. Away from society, the civilians lived a life of slavery, drug addiction, and witchcraft. They were hated by dominicans and rejected by the culture. They were nothing but ants to the government. But here we were, headed their way.There is something about those out casted by society that fuels my heart to love. Maybe because it did the same to Jesus. He had a view for the least of these that was parallel to that of the government and pharisees. They scolded him when he helped prostitutes and lepers and encouraged him to stay within the boundaries of the good hearted and clean. But love does not have boundaries when it comes to Jesus. It is universal and should be expressed as such within the hearts of anyone who claims to announce themselves as followers. 
   As we approached a village called, "Batay Whatever", civilians welcomed us one by one. We met women who were trapped in prostitution and joined hands with a pastor as she joyfully praised God for her newborn granddaughter. As all of this was going on, I walked outside and began looking for children to begin relationship with. I started to pull small toys out of my bag and out of no where they came. From out of houses and behind bushes they ran towards me and stretched out their hands. Once all was distributed, I sat and talked with some boys sitting against a tree. We began playing games and laughing at each other when one of us lost. In the back of the group of children surrounding me stood a boy covered in dirt and grime. He smelled and had scars all over. 
   As I went to shake his hand I realized that his hands looked infected and dirty. I at that moment could of backed away or proceeded. I had the choice to risk myself of sickness or show compassion. I closed my eyes, smiled, then not only shook his hand but picked him up and tickled him. As he laughed and screamed, the thoughts of his dirty hands and body went away. Behind all of the dirt still remained a boy who just needed someone to love him. His parents refuse to bath him due to the lack of compassion they have for him, so why should I do the same? Why should I turn away from a child just because everyone else already has? For did Christ do the same to me? NO! In fact he took my infected hand and embraced my filthy body and held me, and spun me, and tickled me. He looked past my dirt and cleansed the thing that mattered. My heart. So, If I reject this child and refuse to be a vessel of Christ and help him, what good is being done?
   On our way back, I looked at my filthy hands and saw the dirt fixated under my nails. My clothes had brown spots and my pants smelled, but my heart.... my heart had grown and flourished. It shined bright and beat beautifully. A smile stretched across my face as I realized the amount of love God has for me. He saw me in that crowd of children. He saw my filth and my grime and my dirt. And He chose me. He loved me. And he didn´t care how dirty He´d get. Nor did I with this child. For in return of the love Christ showed me, I loved this child.  

Leaving Home for Home

As my last day here in the United States finally approaches, I am reminded of all who helped me get to the position I am at today. Two years ago I confronted my friends and family to ask for help with a one week mission trip I was going on with my school. Fast forward three more mission trips and they are still my backbone. I can't tell you how grateful I am for the continuous prayers, financial help, and donations given by you all. From flip flops to checks housing hundreds of dollars, I am at awe of the community that resides within my friends and family. The most important and heart warming gift I have been awarded is the unstoppable prayer that has been poured down upon me and Blake. Nothing is more fulfilling and more powerful than a simple prayer from children, teens, teachers, pastors, principals, and my own parents. From the bottom of my heart.... Thank you.

I am looking at my luggage in my room while listening to music and just overjoyed at the fact that in 48 hours, I will no longer be here, but instead in a country far from here with endless opportunities to bring God's prodigal sons and daughters home. I know I talk about it constantly, but I care so much about those children. If you are near me, they're all I talk about. If you were to see my room, I have pictures, notes, and jewelry given to me by them all hanging on my walls. I have been woken up to the importance of what spending just a little time with someone and saying few comforting words can do to somebody. It started with picking a child up. It started with playing relay races with them. It then led to walking with them, sitting with them, and talking with them. As our relationship grew, I met their families and I placed myself in their shoes as they welcomed me into their own little world. I witnessed tragedies that were occurring in their homes. I found the sad fact that some of them weren't even welcome in their own church. I saw the heaviness of conviction resting upon their shoulders and held them as they cried out for forgiveness. 

That's what just picking up a child can do. That's what stepping out of your comfort zone and putting someone above your own needs can do. That's what Jesus did for us. People still ask why I go. They still question my motives for going. They can't seem to understand why I am spending time with these children rather than pursuing a degree. My answer.. because Jesus gave all He had to make sure we had a chance at everlasting life with Him. I go because He came. I sacrifice because He sacrificed it all. I hold those sad, broken children because He never stopped holding me. He is my Daddy and those children don't know what a Daddy is. And they need to know! So, I go! And I will continue to go. To the ends of the earth if I have to. To the depths of the scariest of countries if I have to. Even if it costs me my life, I will never stop pursuing the prodigal sons and daughters of my generation for the sake of the kingdom. For God so loved the world, that He gave... so that we may give until we bleed. 

Summer DR trip: Part 2

Hey everyone! I don't know who still reads these, but if you are, you're awesome and I love you! So, In case you didn't know, In just 3 weeks I will be boarding a plane back to the Dominican Republic and will be gone until September. However, unlike last year, I will be accompanied by my best friend this time around. His name is Blake Smith, and after rededicating his life to Christ in December, Christ layed both of us on the same path: Making disciples! God has so many things planned for our ministry this summer, and I can't wait to see what unfolds!

I want to so badly take every minute out of everyday and focus on the trip, but I don't think I have ever been so busy in my life. Last year, things were simpler, but this guy right here is graduating in just 5 days. And the school decided to have finals, graduation, and an end of the year play all in the same week, so my blog post today will be rather brief considering the fact that I have a Literature paper and economics flash cards laying right infront of me.

To take a step back and look at my life last year compared to now literally leaves me speechless. I am amazed at the work God has done on my heart followed by the extreme power and grace that has trailed behind it. I have fallen and cried and grown. My faith has been tested and temptation won sometimes, but my love for God and His love for me never changed. And look at me now. I am getting on a plane to go and serve His children. The children that don't know what a father is. The ones who don't have "love" in their dictionary. Of all people... He chose me to do this... I am so undeserving and so unworthy yet he sends me. God is way more loving and bigger than I could ever imagined.

Well, this is goodbye until I can get past finals and graduation. Peace out!

One Tribe

So, I was recently chosen to receive an award for a paper I wrote at my school that revolved around unity. I wanted to share it with people so here it is. Enjoy :)

Stories of third world countries and starving villages across the globe cause confusion, anger, and sadness in the hearts of Americans followed by the question of, “Why God?”  The reality is some of those people starving, dying, and sick have never even asked that question themselves, because a faith in Jesus is all they can afford. In South Sudan, there are Christians being persecuted daily. Within the walls of accusation, judgment, and hatred towards the Christian faith lay the painful consequences of calling yourself a Christ follower. If you want to see Biblical persecution face to face, travel to South Sudan. But where there is persecution, there is also unity. There is a unity that cannot be broken; a unity that fights its way through until no man is left breathing; a unity between martyrs.

            As the rain fell one night in a small Christian village on the outskirts of South Sudan, sounds of praise overpowered the muffled gunshots being fired continuously miles away. In war, worshiping God had the most power.  It overpowered fear. It conquered anxiety, and it destroyed any doubt. Nothing seemed more beautiful than witnessing hundreds of villagers lifting hands and lifting songs up to a God that can’t be seen by anyone who lives a better life than the bone visible tribes giving all they had in a few worship songs and scripture. At the center of this tribe lay a unity never before seen. This group of people knew of the death they could face for proclaiming the word of God, and not only went about proclaiming it, but did so together. They, physically poor yet spiritually ripe, brought up revival among their mud huts and dirt roads. As bullets fired in neighboring tribes, their ministry intensified. When danger drew near, unity grew stronger. Praises rang louder, and disciples multiplied. As the tribe’s days were surely numbered, fear was non-existent.

            It was an early Sunday morning when the first round of gunshots were fired at the village guards. Muslim militia surrounded the village waiting anxiously for riot and chaos to ensue, but stillness startled the men. Slowly, one by one, the villagers came out of their homes. The militia were not hesitant with them. The first ten to exit were shot dead, six of them recently baptized the previous week. As blood replaced the brown dirt, villagers began singing hymns and gathering together in the chapel as if it were a normal Sunday. Although they knew death was literally minutes away, they did not let fear take away their faith in the one who once sacrificed all He had for them. 

            Guards surrounded the church and pulled every church member out and onto the street. Holding hands, the villagers arose from the dirt and stood strong against the face of evil. “Father, forgive them,” cried an eleven year old boy whose tear-stained eyes began fixing up into the heavens. His mother lay dead in front of him. At this moment, the soldiers stood in front of them, loading their guns. “You will fear us by the end of today. All of you, Christians! For miles, this story of victory among Muslims will be told!” snarled the commander. “The only one we fear is the One who sent us here to die for His sake,” said a teenage boy as he clutched his mother and baby sister’s hand with all the strength he had left. Immediately, after the boy proclaimed his statement, an elderly woman fell to her knees weeping. “I have waited eighty years for this day. Today, I will get to meet the One who has never left my side.” The pastor of the village placed a hand on her shoulder and softly spoke, “We all will together.” The laughter of the militia intensified as they readied their aim. “Fire!” yelled the commander.

            As flames arose from the huts, angels arose from the dirt. It wasn’t just villagers who died that day. It was a tribe. It was Christians. What remained was the truth of what unity means. Unity isn’t those who stay strong with creation. True and utter unity is those who stay strong with their Creator, no matter what tragedy may come. No height, nor depth could explain the true love a Father has for His children and His children for their Father. To be unified in the face of death is the strongest type of unity there is. 

Living out a dream that's not my own

Who knew that three years from Sophomore year I would be investing my time into hundreds of poverty stricken children who lack the love of Jesus let alone investing my time in a relationship with Jesus Himself. Who knew that one week long trip three years ago would turn into a life long commitment. Who knew that one teen convention three years ago at Lee University would light a spark in my heart for cross cultural missions. Who knew that a conversation with a woman pursuing medical missions three years ago would cause a longing to see hungry children fed physically and spiritually. Who knew that a personal dream to pursue acting would turn into God's dream for me to pursue children and teens hungry for grace in the Dominican Republic. Who knew..... 

I have had to sit down and process what occurred on my previous trip back to the DR last week. I can honestly say it hasn't been anything like the other three trips, including my two month journey there over summer break. Hearts were broken, relationships grew, and Jesus impacted lives like never before... including mine. I went into this trip with a plan, not only for the week but for what was to happen afterwards as well. All of it.... my plans.. my future... was shattered. I can't really tell when it hit me that God had a bigger plan for me and the Dominican Republic. So much happened in the little amount of time that we were there that I really don't know what to think. All I know is that I had plans to attend a 6 month program called YWAM when I returned home after this summer, and now God just wants me to go ahead and move there. 

It all could have hit me when I sat down with Elmun, a boy I have grown to love over the past 3 years, and saw his broken spirit as he explained that his father drinks too much and sometimes lays his hands on the child. It could have hit me when I saw a little boy who hadn't eaten in several days, yet walked up front during an alter call to accept Jesus. It all could have hit me when I held 7 year old Chino in my arms as He cried out for God to enter his heart. All of these impacting moments made me realize something. God doesn't need me in 2 years when I graduate a discipleship program. He doesn't need me when I have a college diploma in my hand or when I find my wife. He needs me now.... there are children who need the gospel now... there are prostitutes, gang members, and drug users who need the gospel of the living Jesus Christ now... 

There is this ocean. And this ocean is deep and dark and no man would dare enter it... but my Abba is asking me to dive right in with no hesitation. With love comes trust, faith, and sacrifice. This ocean.. this sea on unknown is the Dominican. It is my Ninevah. When I arrive, i have no idea what will happen... but that's the best part. I have wanted to plan out and know exactly what I will be doing for my entire life. There has been no trust or faith or sacrifice to hold up the meaning of my love for Jesus. And now... If I want to love God with all of my heart and with abandonment, I must sacrifice. I must have faith that when moments of unknown come my way.. I will not fall to hesitation. I will rise. I will rise above the waves of the powerful ocean and take hold of Christ's hand just as Peter did when he turned his eyes away from the Lord. I want Jesus.. I want him now and tomorrow and the next day and for eternity. If there is no proof backing up my audible "I love yous" then how can I live out this dream of being with Jesus for eternity..... And it hits me... for us to be rewarded with our dreams of eternity with Jesus.. we must fulfill God's dreams for us. And with love and action and truth. 

The Love of a Father

Today, something amazing happened. A man by the name of "Papa Joe" came to our school to give his life story and the meaning behind the movie created after him called "Unconditional" (Which I highly recommend) To summarize his testimony, Papa Joe grew up with a rough life centered around pride and an absence of a father figure. As he grew up and after a serious downfall in his life leading to 8 years in prison, Joe encountered what it meant to love and be loved by a Father who would never leave or abandon Him. A father that is always protecting and prospering His children that choose to surrender to Him. After being released from Prison, Papa Joe moved down to a very poor area in Nashville where he met his wife and began a new life with her. 

Something amazing happened within those first few months in the projects. God gave Joe a heart for children. And not just your average child, but the ones who were broken and without fathers. one after another, children began to gravitate to his home and as his ministry began to grow, so did the love and power of Christ through Papa Joe. He went from just handing out candy to kids, to feeding entire communities and mentoring kids all across Nashville and the rest of the country. 

I think it was God's doing bringing that man to my school, for his words and testimony is exactly what I've been needing to hear. At this moment, I have over 100 children in the Dominican who desire a relationship with both an earthly and heavenly father. When I see his ministry, I can picture what I want mine to look like in the upcoming years. I don't see college on this road I'm walking, nor do I see a big house with a cheeky "suburban" family and luxurious lifestyle. But what I do see is myself after a long day, covered in dirt and sweat from helping, loving, and serving the least of these. And in my eyes... right now the least of these are those children who are growing up in homes that are bound to cave in on them if they don't have a father figure to hold up the foundation. I could easily brush this dire need off my shoulder and say "someone else will do it" or I can get up, pack my things, die to myself, and live the rest of my life thriving and loving as Jesus did. I am on this earth to be in complete surrender to God, not in complete surrender to comfort. 

I look at Chino, Nino, Angel Manuel, and Angelica Maria, who have lost their father to suicide, and wonder who in the world is going to take them in. Then I ask God... "Did you Oh Lord.. want me.. of all people.. to guide these children." and the Bible verse Matthew 25:35-40 comes to my mind and pierces my heart.

   " For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, 36 I was naked and you clothed me, I was sick and you visited me, I was in prison and you came to me.’ 37 Then the righteous will answer him, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you drink? 38 And when did we see you a stranger and welcome you, or naked and clothe you? 39 And when did we see you sick or in prison and visit you?’ 40 And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me." 

As these finals days of preparation for my return to the Dominican Republic approach, I am overwhelmed with the sure fact that in just days I will get to go on a plane, walk into one of the most dirtiest and dangerous neighborhoods, walk up to Chino, Nino, Manuel, and Angelica Maria and give them the biggest hug you could possibly imagine. And I love them, not because they are poor... or because they have no Father.... but because when I see them.. I see Jesus. And I am to treat these beautifully broken children as I would treat my Abba Father. God bless you all and please keep me and the teams in your prayers as we venture out into the unknown next Monday. 

A friend. A brother.

Hey everyone! It has been a while, I know! After 12 years of schooling I am still trying to figure this stuff out. I am now at T-minus 11 days until I return to the Dominican Republic for a 1 week mission trip with my school. It is tough to enter a country for a short amount of time after you've spent an entire summer there, but I'm just happy that in under two short weeks I will be reunited with the same wonderful hugs and kisses from the same wonderful kids that stole my heart this time two years ago.

On another note, God has been doing some amazing work in my life. To start, After going to a Christian convention called "One Thing" with my senior class in December, God has placed a 6 month program called YWAM in my path. I will be attending classes late August. But before I get to the direction God has me headed in, I'd like to talk about someone who he has placed in my life to walk this road of wonder and unknown with me. No relatives who always ask if I have a girlfriend, it is not one of those bizarre creatures. Rather, it is someone I have been praying for God to place in my life for a very long time. For years, in fact.

For the longest time, I was very very infatuated in finding a "bestfriend". Everyone around me all my life had at least one person that they grew closer to than any other friends. And growing up, I never had one. There would be nights where I would question myself and question God as to why others could have the closeness with another person, but I was without that. It bothered me all the way through high school until I just left it alone. I had tons of friends, so why complain? Little did I know, however, that God has plans for our walk and answers our prayers, just not at the times we want Him to.

As I was planning out how my future in missions would look, God decided to place an individual in my path to not only encounter this journey with me, but to help me grow in Christ with him. And of all people, this individual was my last guess as to who God would chose to put in my life to help me strengthen my relationship with Jesus.

It was mid November and I was awake late at night praying and worshipping God when I came across a post about God transforming this young man's life. This young man happened to be the same guy who influenced me my junior year to get involved in partying and things that drew me away from my Abba. Little did I know that God was about to teach me forgiveness in the weirdest way possible. By uniting two people whom would never thought would be friends again after high school. I knew the guy one year and after I gave my life completely to Christ, I never really spoke to him. We were headed into two separate directions, but now... now he did the unthinkable. He realized the path he was on had an end he knew he didn't want to reach. So he simply turned in the opposite direction and fought Satan head on to get back to Jesus.

This whole sudden transformation has happened to many of my friends who are caught up in addiction or lack of faith, and what usually happens is a sudden spiritual high then a defeat followed by a reentering to their old life, but this.... this was different. For some odd reason, I saw potential. For the first time, I saw transformation happening in this boy just by reading the compassion in his post. He meant it... He really meant it. Not 30 minutes later did this guy randomly call me telling me what had just happened in his life. That very next day we hung out and....well.... haven't really stopped. In fact, I went from having one bible study alone once every month to a bible study every other day with my brother in Christ. From Matthew to Revelation, we are encountering Christ together. And we will continue to pursue this unfathomable God together.

In Luke 10:1-4 it says, "After this the Lord appointed seventy-two others and sent them on ahead of him, two by two, into every town and place where he himself was about to go. 2 And he said to them, “The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few. Therefore pray earnestly to the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into his harvest. 3 Go your way; behold, I am sending you out as lambs in the midst of wolves. 4 Carry no moneybag, no knapsack, no sandals, and greet no one on the road."
After both me and my new brother discovered this verse, we smiled with Joy and realized the very reason God put is together. So that we may strengthen and lengthen the kingdom of God through His love and power. He is going to YWAM with me. He is coming with me to the Dominican in 11 days and again this summer for a month. Me and Him are experiencing life together. And the transformation won't start when these trips occur, for it has already begun! Every week, we have started leading Bible studies together with new believers who are needing guidance.

God truly works wonders in the oddest of ways. This man has gone from a friend, to a stranger, to a brother! And my forgiveness for him stretches over the ends of the earth. For I would have never met him if I hadn't been invited to those parties..... God works things out and lets things happen so that He may receive the glory. We were both prodigal sons who just came home at different times. But we came back to the same Father who loved us just the same. After years of prayer for that one friend who I can have this closeness to than others can.. God answered my prayer.. and then some. He not only gave me a best friend.. He gave me a fellow disciple who is SAVED and who loves Jesus more than he loves himself. I am proud to call him my brother!

So ladies and gents... That is what is going on right now. I am being continuously left with my jaw to the floor due to the amazing power God shows me. I am undeserving and I need nothing but to be left for dead.. but God loved me so much that he brings me to life every single day. I am destined for Hell, but my God redeems me every second. I should be struck dead but Christ brings life through every breath I take.