Carry your Cross

We were sitting on the bus on our way to a batay when me and Marcos came across a man literally carrying a cross down the highway. I laughed a bit at first at how ironic the situation was, but then I began to really process what I saw. What does it really mean to carry our cross?

In Matthew 16:24-25 it says, 


              ¨Then Jesus said to His disciples, if any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. For whosoever will save his life shall lose it; and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it. ¨


I have read this verse over and over again wondering if I am really carrying my cross, or if I am just dragging it on the ground behind me... There is a big difference between calling yourself a christian and being a follower of Christ. Am I risking myself for the love of Christ as Stephen did when he was martyred? Am I sacraficing everything to live for Christ like Job did when he lost his family, crops, and had boils all over his body? Am I being as open about my God as John the Baptist was? And most of all, am I carrying that cross that my savior was nailed to? I am giving 100%? 

 I know that right now I might never do enough, but I won´t ever stop trying. I want to push myself for Christ, give until my wallet hurts, test my limits, go to the places where happiness is scarce. Living life being 100% with my faith is who I wish to be seen as. One of the most uplifting things about being down here is having that constant reminder of what it means to carry your cross. 

I see it in the 14 year old girl who is taking that 30% chance of living through her surgery on Tuesday. I see it in the teenager who got his arm cut off by a machete yet still goes to church every sunday to worship the God who prevented him from having both removed. I see it in the 70 year old woman living in a Hatian Batay who although is mentally challnged, led her husband to Christ and leads worship every time there is a service. 

To have a constant reminder that carrying your cross is worth every ounce of struggle gives me reassurance that All of this work I have been doing these past two months, no matter how little it has seemed, will lead others to pick up their cross as well; and when it seems as if my cross has become too heavy, I have a savior who I can lean on.